1. Sprayed carb cleaner into a goddang mother freaking Stihl brush cutter carb and it came out of the curved fuel line in a boomerang fashion right into my eyes. Don’t ever do that, fellas. It was scary painful. Use safety glasses with spray solvents.
2. Punched a mother trucking wall one time in a blind rage and hit a stud. Sprained wrist. Very stupid.
3. Was working on our house remodel years ago and using a razor blade to cut a new hinge profile in a door I was replacing. Was using my pinky finger under the door as leverage and pressure to pull the knife free-hand style. Again, stupid. You know what happened. Nearly cut it off when the knife slipped. Bone stopped it. Bleeding like a stuck pig, I grabbed it for pressure and within 5 seconds blood was oozing through my fingers. Almost panicked, but it was 10pm, no one around, and I’m miles from help. Calmed myself, found some mineral spirits in the garage and used a semi-clean rag to soak and clean, wrapped in another “clean-ish” rag and wrapped tight with painters tape. Saved my finger. Lesson: don’t panic, stay calm think slow and use your head in emergencies. Next day my family freaked when they saw how much blood.
4. Was playing 2-on-2 full court basketball with a guy I’ve played against many times that was taller and more athletic, but this day I was killing this dude. Was going for the one stat I hadn’t gotten yet, a block. Let him go by me and was trying to block from behind, got one fingertip on the ball (hooray!!!), feet got tangled up and 3 days later I’m having ACL reconstruction/cartilage surgery. Was flying too close to the sun that day and got greedy. Idiot. Should have just taken the win on a high note and never play again. 17 me
5. Too many back strains to mention. Use jacks, levers, dollies, pulleys, ropes, fellas. God only gave you one back, take care of it. Now I have a tractor with a loader and forks which has become invaluable. Highly recommend if you have room and can justify. I’ll never have another tractor without a loader.
6. Was cutting a tree for my horrible thankless mother in law on a windy day because she asked me to. Stupid. Cut the bit, gust of wind leaned it toward the house, I panicked, and pushed with all my strength to slow it’s fall on the house. It slowly rested on the roof with no damage, but not before it broke the radius in my right arm. Lesson: stand up to crazyasss thankless mothers-in-law, fellas
7. Stacked some 8 foot 2x4’s on the back rack of the 4-wheeler. Was riding around, looking and checking things, and decided to zip up the trail to the house for another beer, forgetting about the cargo behind me. Hit 2nd gear building speed, and as I went past a tree next to the trail, the ends of those 2x4’s caught the tree, smacked me in the rib cage, and flipped me off that b!tch like a pinball. As the 4 wheeler stopped and started easing back down the hill, the stack of wood slid off the side and unceremoniously all fell on top of me. Had black and blue ribs for weeks. Remember the cargo you’re hauling, fellas.
