OT: Parents: Let the Coaches Coach by Jay Paterno

[StamfordBridgeVikingatLeftOffensiveTackle]

A brief, well-constructed article with a clear message. Well-done Jay.

Parents: Let the Coaches Coach

While talking to an athletic director of a Power 5 NCAA school recently, the subject of players transferring and today’s student-athletes came up. When

www.statecollege.com

 

[91Joe95]

Don't blame the kids, blame the parents? That's crazy talk.

 

[Nitt1300]

Karens and Kens

 

[step.eng69]

Karens and Kens

Hey Nitt, My wife's name is Karen.
With Karen, there is no excuse for failure if you try your best.

Met her on April 10th while i was playing basketball in the school yard with the older guys. I was in 8th grade. Karen and her two friends, Morris & Clapper, were on the schools side porch waiting for the bus and watching us play. They were ragging on me, from a distance, about my performance. I knew Clapper, the other two, not. When I saw Karen for the first time, our friendship began that day and continues 59 yrs later.

 

[J.E.B]

Fat chance Jay. Not with what we parents have to pay to have our kids play simple games. You better believe I’m going to let the VB coach know that for $6k a year my daughter better play. I don’t expect her to be forefront but she better see time or the money is rebated. Of course that doesn’t happen. True story of bloody club volleyball in SoCal ten years ago. Club coaches, who were simply supplementing their day job income, expected that kind of minimal contribution per player. Not a bad gig if you can get it. Parents were told don’t play HS ball. Play with me and I’ll get her in a position to get a scholarship. Some of these sports and coaches are rackets, nowadays. Not all but some are in it with ulterior motives.

 

[PSUJam]

Fat chance Jay. Not with what we parents have to pay to have our kids play simple games. You better believe I’m going to let the VB coach know that for $6k a year my daughter better play. I don’t expect her to be forefront but she better see time or the money is rebated. Of course that doesn’t happen. True story of bloody club volleyball in SoCal ten years ago. Club coaches, who were simply supplementing their day job income, expected that kind of minimal contribution per player. Not a bad gig if you can get it. Parents were told don’t play HS ball. Play with me and I’ll get her in a position to get a scholarship. Some of these sports and coaches are rackets, nowadays. Not all but some are in it with ulterior motives.

The AAU racket I see these days is having the kids try out for a team then making no cuts and adding another team for a place to put the extra kids. It's a $ham(e).

 

[Keyser Soze 16802]

Is it still OK to gripe about needless delay of game penalties?

 

[BobPSU92]

Hey Nitt, My wife's name is Karen.
With Karen, there is no excuse for failure if you try your best.

Met her on April 10th while i was playing basketball in the school yard with the older guys. I was in 8th grade. Karen and her two friends, Morris & Clapper, were on the schools side porch waiting for the bus and watching us play. They were ragging on me, from a distance, about my performance. I knew Clapper, the other two, not. When I saw Karen for the first time, our friendship began that day and continues 59 yrs later.

You were in the 8th grade six days ago? Wow.

 

[marshall23]

Parents thinking they are creating d1 athletes
If you are paying 6 grand for your child to be on a team....I've got a bridge for sale.

 

[marshall23]

After more than 37 years as a high school coach and AD...I think parents should be seen but never heard. My folks supported my participation in sports , but could differentiate between their lives and mine.

 

[Bkmtnittany1]

You were in the 8th grade six days ago? Wow.

I think step meant to say that he spent 59 years in 8th grade! That New Math is a b* tch

 

[Bison13]

I try to chart everything at practice for idiot parents. basketball practice has a 15 minute session where every kid who thinks they can shoot 3s gets to shoot 25 like in the nba 3 pt contest. I have 4 managers at practice chart those shots plus various other things like turnovers, missed lay ups, lack of hustle etc. yesterday’s stats are posted at the start of practice. Baseball I chart balls and strikes in bullpen sessions, pfp, bunt defense etc. line drive percent in bp, bunt success rate…

I actually LOVE when a parent challenges the staff about playing time and show them the data.

Some people are just idiots though like the parent of a basketball player who, of course, called me racist when their kid didn’t start. Instead of talking to the parent I called over my two african American assistant coaches who played in college and let the parent talk to them. Let’s just say they were not as civil to the parent as I would have been.

 

[psuro]

Effing self absorbed breedres are ruining sports for everyone else.

 

[WDLion]

Fat chance Jay. Not with what we parents have to pay to have our kids play simple games. You better believe I’m going to let the VB coach know that for $6k a year my daughter better play. I don’t expect her to be forefront but she better see time or the money is rebated. Of course that doesn’t happen. True story of bloody club volleyball in SoCal ten years ago. Club coaches, who were simply supplementing their day job income, expected that kind of minimal contribution per player. Not a bad gig if you can get it. Parents were told don’t play HS ball. Play with me and I’ll get her in a position to get a scholarship. Some of these sports and coaches are rackets, nowadays. Not all but some are in it with ulterior motives.

There's a sucker born every minute.

 

[BobPSU92]

Effing self absorbed breedres are ruining sports for everyone else.

Let the kids ruin sports.

 

[BobPSU92]

If an adult doesn’t have a kid on the public school team, is he/she, as a taxpayer, still allowed to berate the coach for not winning enough? Asking for me.

 

[razpsu]

A brief, well-constructed article with a clear message. Well-done Jay.

Parents: Let the Coaches Coach

While talking to an athletic director of a Power 5 NCAA school recently, the subject of players transferring and today’s student-athletes came up. When

www.statecollege.com

I would pick parents coaching over jay paterno any day and twice on saturdays.

 

[BobPSU92]

I would pick parents coaching over jay paterno any day and twice on saturdays.

I wouldn’t, but I don’t hate Jay like I’m supposed to.

 

[Nitt1300]

I would pick parents coaching over jay paterno any day and twice on saturdays.

seems like a you problem

 

[psuro]

Let the kids ruin sports.

The way God intended.

 

[psuro]

If an adult doesn’t have a kid on the public school team, is he/she, as a taxpayer, still allowed to berate the coach for not winning enough? Asking for me.

And me. Report back with your findings.

 

[razpsu]

I wouldn’t, but I don’t hate Jay like I’m supposed to.

Why do you have to hate him. Just he wasn’t a qualified coach plain and simple.

 

[razpsu]

seems like a you problem

No. Not really. Who is jay to give advice.

 

[PSUJam]

No. Not really. Who is jay to give advice.

Did you go to high school with Jay, Raz?

 

[razpsu]

Did you go to high school with Jay, Raz?

No he was years behind. Graduated with his brother Dave.

 

[Nitt1300]

No. Not really. Who is jay to give advice.

the question is who is right and who is wrong- and in this case, I'll go with Jay

 

[razpsu]

the question is who is right and who is wrong- and in this case, I'll go with Jay

There is no right or wrong. I don’t believe parents should interfere with coaching. I also know that the coach isn’t always right. I just don’t want to listen to someone that isn’t really qualified and didn’t earn what he was given.

 

[GrimReaper]

There is no right or wrong. I don’t believe parents should interfere with coaching. I also know that the coach isn’t always right. I just don’t want to listen to someone that isn’t really qualified and didn’t earn what he was given.

Qualified? You don't have to have coaching experience to know right and wrong in this case, and yes, there is a right.

 

[razpsu]

Qualified? You don't have to have coaching experience to know right and wrong in this case, and yes, there is a right.

First part is true.

 

[CDLionFL]

Like coaches, officials constantly get criticism and catcalls. Some of it is playful, most of it is not. If I did engage with those who feel like they can call a tag play at the plate from 60 feet away at a bad angle behind a fence better than me who is standing right in front of it, I'd invite them to change places and see how they'd like it. Coaches could do the same thing -- if a parent doesn't like what's going on, then let's switch spots and we'll see how much you flail around.

 

[Nitt1300]

There is no right or wrong. I don’t believe parents should interfere with coaching. I also know that the coach isn’t always right. I just don’t want to listen to someone that isn’t really qualified and didn’t earn what he was given.

Sounds like some deep-seated personal resentment there. Therapy might help.

 

[razpsu]

Sounds like some deep-seated personal resentment there. Therapy might help.

Personal resentment lol. You need therapy when all you do is discount other peoples opinions.

 

[Connorpozlee]

Like coaches, officials constantly get criticism and catcalls. Some of it is playful, most of it is not. If I did engage with those who feel like they can call a tag play at the plate from 60 feet away at a bad angle behind a fence better than me who is standing right in front of it, I'd invite them to change places and see how they'd like it. Coaches could do the same thing -- if a parent doesn't like what's going on, then let's switch spots and we'll see how much you flail around.

I’ve watched my kids on teams with some terrible coaching. I’ve never once voiced my complaint because I was not willing to do the job myself.
That said, I have certainly worked with them at home to correct some of the things their coaches have taught them. Travel ball where you have to pay a lot of money for them makes it a little different but my feelings were still the same for those teams.

 

[CDLionFL]

I’ve watched my kids on teams with some terrible coaching. I’ve never once voiced my complaint because I was not willing to do the job myself.
That said, I have certainly worked with them at home to correct some of the things their coaches have taught them. Travel ball where you have to pay a lot of money for them makes it a little different but my feelings were still the same for those teams.

I agree with ya in restructuring things at home that you may not agree with at the field as long as you and your kids both understand that when it's at the field, the coach is still the authority. I think it's the duty of the parent to reinforce at home what is taught in the classroom/playing field and allow their kids an open forum to discuss what goes on at practice and games and work on any necessary fixes.

 

[marshall23]

During football season my junior year in high school...I made the mistake of complaining about something during dinner .... my Dad looked me in the eye and said, "if playing football doesn't make you happy you can come and work for me after school."
I never brought "my sport problems " to my parents again.
My Dad in a simple but forceful way taught me perspective. He survived the Battle of the Bulge and was working 60 hours a week to manage a business and put food on our table. Those few words made me appreciate the privilege of participation in sport.

 

[BobPSU92]

During football season my junior year in high school...I made the mistake of complaining about something during dinner .... my Dad looked me in the eye and said, "if playing football doesn't make you happy you can come and work for me after school."
I never brought "my sport problems " to my parents again.
My Dad in a simple but forceful way taught me perspective. He survived the Battle of the Bulge and was working 60 hours a week to manage a business and put food on our table. Those few words made me appreciate the privilege of participation in sport.

I bet your father would love us.

 

[marshall23]

I bet your father would love us.

As I do.

 

[BobPSU92]

As I do.

Your father deserves better than us.

 

[Connorpozlee]

I agree with ya in restructuring things at home that you may not agree with at the field as long as you and your kids both understand that when it's at the field, the coach is still the authority. I think it's the duty of the parent to reinforce at home what is taught in the classroom/playing field and allow their kids an open forum to discuss what goes on at practice and games and work on any necessary fixes.

Kind of. If the coach is coaching something that is absolutely wrong (for instance, when my sister was in high school the coach came up with some contraption at practice to help keep the front arm close to the body when at bat….. except he put it on the back arm, thus making it impossible to hit the ball) then you have to tell the kids that the coach is wrong. This is not an Xs and Os thing, but just common sense. Another example would be my daughter playing volleyball and me telling her over and over that she should be stepping with her left foot instead of her right to serve with her right hand, which her coach was OK with even though she could only hit the top of the net like that.

 

[marshall23]

Your father deserves better than us.

Like most kids of the 50s and 60s...I grew up surrounded by heroes. My Dad was one of them. I only wish I recognized it back then. I had an uncle who left one leg on the Ludendorf Bridge (at Remagen). He was only 19. Every winter my Dad's hands turned black, cracked and bled (after effects of frostbite from the Ardennes). Those guys had more dignity than to berate sport officials or coaches.