First off, birds aren't real.
The peeper went off on an old man rant about NIL that inspired me. I'm chairing my own NIL for, among others, long time fans who have blindly spent piles money on hope that did not necessarily pan out. It shall be called Hollowed Out, LLC.
The funds will reimburse a diverse base of fans, boosters, and random individuals who, by design or happenstance, put eyeballs on and goodwill toward MSU.
MSU reaped the benefits! And gave nothing!
A score will be afforded to the individual(s) based on a complicated and subjective points system that most of you won't understand, so no point in me explaining it.
Among the first to recieve funds will be anyone mortgaging a single-wide mobile home to be amongst of the throngs who got TD Ameritrade dubbed Dudy Noble North. Double -wides may be assessed a luxury tax on funds received.
The peeper may not get enough to feed his kids and baby mamas, but his loyalty will be noted. I'll even make sure taxes on his NIL cashier's check shall be deferred should he decide to donate a sizeable portion of said funds to the Bulldog Club.
Other notable recipients:
Parachute guy who bounced off Scott Field
"Go to hell Bin Laden" guy
All who threw garbage at Demarcus Cousins
That generous tire dealer in Starkville
Hot female MSU cheerleaders
I have started a spreadsheet for season ticket holders starting year 1972. It formulates preseason hype vs. final records. It factors money spent on seasons with little hope, adjusts for inflation, and rounds all numbers down. All who bought season tickets for the rare instance where the football team exceeded expectations will be assessed a bill.
This NIL will be fairly and justly distributed based on loyalty and misery endured. Obviously, potential success or suffering is difficult to place a dollar figure on, but not impossible.
The peeper went off on an old man rant about NIL that inspired me. I'm chairing my own NIL for, among others, long time fans who have blindly spent piles money on hope that did not necessarily pan out. It shall be called Hollowed Out, LLC.
The funds will reimburse a diverse base of fans, boosters, and random individuals who, by design or happenstance, put eyeballs on and goodwill toward MSU.
MSU reaped the benefits! And gave nothing!
A score will be afforded to the individual(s) based on a complicated and subjective points system that most of you won't understand, so no point in me explaining it.
Among the first to recieve funds will be anyone mortgaging a single-wide mobile home to be amongst of the throngs who got TD Ameritrade dubbed Dudy Noble North. Double -wides may be assessed a luxury tax on funds received.
The peeper may not get enough to feed his kids and baby mamas, but his loyalty will be noted. I'll even make sure taxes on his NIL cashier's check shall be deferred should he decide to donate a sizeable portion of said funds to the Bulldog Club.
Other notable recipients:
Parachute guy who bounced off Scott Field
"Go to hell Bin Laden" guy
All who threw garbage at Demarcus Cousins
That generous tire dealer in Starkville
Hot female MSU cheerleaders
I have started a spreadsheet for season ticket holders starting year 1972. It formulates preseason hype vs. final records. It factors money spent on seasons with little hope, adjusts for inflation, and rounds all numbers down. All who bought season tickets for the rare instance where the football team exceeded expectations will be assessed a bill.
This NIL will be fairly and justly distributed based on loyalty and misery endured. Obviously, potential success or suffering is difficult to place a dollar figure on, but not impossible.
