Ranking the Monster Trucks of Monster Jam
On America’s birthday we celebrate what makes our nation great. Hot dogs cooked over charcoal, explosions across the sky and 1,500 horsepower engines launching 12,000-pound automobiles through the air.
Monster trucks are one of the many rediscoveries that have made parenthood an enriching experience. Twenty-five years after attending a Monster Jam rally at Freedom Hall, this spring I took my son for his first ever experience with the beasts. I’m not sure I could’ve given him a better birthday present. If we aren’t playing sports, we’re playing monster trucks. We watch Monster Jam on TV and even have Monster Jam shirts. It’s kind of a big deal in the Roush house.
During our play time I’ve come to learn the various monster trucks by name. Who is the craziest? Which one does the best tricks? They say write what you know, and right now I know a little too much about monster trucks. That’s why to celebrate the Fourth of July I’m ranking the top 10 of almost 50 trucks on the Monster Jam roster.
10. Soldier Fortune
There’s nothing too remarkable about this monster truck, but my kid can’t really pronounce the truck’s name. “Whoa! It’s saw-jer fart-tune!” makes me chuckle every single time.
9. Monster Mutt
There are three different iterations of the dog-like monster truck. Whether you prefer the Dalmatian, Rottweiler or just the OG Monster Mutt, the floppy ears and spring-loaded tail are entertaining additions to the enormous machines.
8. ThunderROARus
Monster trucks are endearing because they are larger than life vehicles that are used just like a child’s toy. “See that big ramp? I’m going to see how high I can jump off it.” Every time I see this mechanized dinosaur riding around the dirt, anything is possible. When it goes on two wheels, the possibilities are seemingly endless.
7. Dragon
For Christmas my son gave his cousins a toy where the Dragon goes off a ramp and lands on top of castle to knock over the “bad guy” guarding the tall tower. It’s such a great toy, when he was finished playing with it he did not want to give it his cousins. Also, this guy breathes fire? How freaking cool is that?
6. Zombie
The facade of each truck gets ripped to shreds throughout a Monster Jam rally. That plays perfectly into the Zombie motif. No matter how haggard it may look, those goofy arms find a way to stay upright and it is laugh out loud funny.
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5. Megladon
Arguably the most recognizable truck on the Monster Jam roster, the enormous shark truck stands out amongst its peers. However, it’s not ranked as high because the bulky frame limits its possibilities. It was disappointing to see, but that can’t completely take away from this vicious predator.
4. Kraken
“What if we made a truck look like it was getting attacked by a Giant Octopus?” I’d love to be in the creative room when they’re work shopping Monster Truck ideas. That’s dream job type stuff.
3. Max-D
I don’t know why Max-D is one of my son’s favorites, but when in doubt, defer to the expert. My 3-year-old certainly qualifies as an expert when it comes to the coolest monster trucks.
2. El Toro Loco
Teaching a child how to say “El Toro Loco” is entertaining. Almost as entertaining as watching a monster truck do a backflip. El Toro Loco was the first to pull off the spectacular feat in 2010.
1. Grave Digger
The OG of Monster Trucks, Grave Digger took monster trucks mainstream shortly after its debut more than 40 years ago. When Grave Digger enters the stadium, the crowd pop is visceral. That excitement only grows during the freestyle portion of the event.
My family’s Monster Jam experience was supposed to be for the kids. When I saw Grave Digger pull of a backflip only 50 feet away, my jaw was on the floor. It’s a truly impeccable piece of machinery, one that should be celebrated as great American ingenuity.
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