Say it, don't spray it

Sure it doesn’t take much creativity on my part, but here’s a compilation of some of the best quotes from last week in the world of sports. Hey, if you can’t say it better yourself…

“If you play on the college level, you ain’t gonna like Kentucky, you just ain’t gonna like them. They’re just one of those teams you’re gonna love them or you’re gonna hate them, and I hate them. I’m being straight forward with you. I don’t like them. I’ve always disliked them, I disliked them at Auburn. They walked around with that swagger, like they’re so good.”

“When they beat you they’re always bragging and stuff like that. One of their guys said, ‘It’s about time you beat us.’ Well, you can say whatever the hell you want. You gotta drive home five hours and put up with a loss.”

—Indiana F Marco Killingsworth after IU routed their rival UK.

Hey Marco, if you’re going to speak on the college level, watch the grammar. Seriously though, do you hate UK? It’s still a little unclear. Good luck in the NBDL though. But wait, like all great athletes who don’t know when to stop, Marco wasn’t finished…
After the final horn, he was overheard shouting to coach Mike Davis, “Finally got ’em! We beat them jokers!”
Speaking of Davis, his quotes after the game this year were much less bipolar than in years past.
Said Davis, “It’s just unbelievable to be able to go home and sit back and watch the news and SportsCenter and not feel like the end of the world’s coming. I don’t have to turn to TNT or the Oxygen station. I can turn to a station with sports on it. In every room of the house.”
Wait a minute… Oxygen? I wonder if Davis watches “Steel Magnolias” with that angry scowl and a pint of Haagen-Daas.

On the other side of the spectrum…

“We’ve got a couple of ego problems. A guy’ll have a good game, and everybody’s high on him and stuff and they’ll stop going to the gym, stop working out. You’ve got to stay humble.”
“I guess we’ve got to play with a lot more heart, and get our big man back.”
—Kentucky G Rajon Rondo
More heart sure, and how about a lot less turnovers too. If you don’t think Morris is any kind of a distraction, read the last line again.

NFL

“We beat ourselves up and down — on offense, defense and special teams. We didn’t spoil their streak, but we can get another shot at them. They can be beat. This team isn’t too much for us. Can we beat them? Hell, yeah.”
—Jaguars LB Mike Peterson after the Colts defeated the ‘Jags 26-18 Sunday.
Did he mean he could beat them on X-Box? Let scores speak for themselves, not overrated linebackers.

Added teammate Fred Taylor, “They’re a good team. I’ll give them credit. They’re a good team, but we beat ourselves more than them being a good team. They’re beatable.”
I’m sure all ‘Jags fans are appreciative of your contribution to the cause: 10 carries, 19 yards.

MLB

“We’ve had two great years, and they were special years…The fact of the matter is Roger’s 43 years old … we’re not talking about somebody in the middle of a great career. We’re talking about somebody who’s at the end of a great career.”
—Tim Purpura Astros GM explaining why the team refused to give Roger Clemens arbitration.
This one is hard to explain. Someone at Clemens’s age should be at the twilight of their career, but how many ‘has-beens’ have a 1.87 ERA with 185 K’s like he did last season. Maybe he’s too expensive, but saying he’s finished? Better pray if he returns that he goes to the AL, Timmy.

NBA

“I think Ronnie is a guy who acts first and thinks later. If he were to do it over again, he might do it differently.”
—-Pacers team president Donnie Walsh on Ron Artest demanding a trade last week.
Anyone else notice that “might” at the end?

“I’m not going to answer any more questions about Ron Artest. Ron doesn’t want to be here, so Ron doesn’t matter anymore.” —-Pacers F Jermaine O’neal
C’mon Jermaine, don’t sugarcoat it for us.

College Football

“I’m just disappointed for my fans, definitely for my teammates, my family back at home, for not representing them in the right way. I just felt like I didn’t represent my team and my family when I didn’t come up with the trophy.”
—-Texas QB Vince Young on finishing second in Heisman voting to USC’s Reggie Bush.
Jeez, poor guy actually thought he had a shot. This would be like Rob Schneider pouting over Jack Nickelson winning an Academy Award. Vince Young is one of the best college players I’ve seen in a loooong time, but Bush it that much better. Young will get his shot at redemption in the Rose Bowl, January 4th.

Misc.

“Yes, John.” Jennifer Anniston

“Good news: It’s been reported that Mary-Kate Olsen has gained 20 lbs. The bad news: Ashley Olsen is missing.”
—-Conan O’Brien

“Hasta la vista, ba-by.”
—-Governor Schwarzenegger to convicted murderer and gang leader “Tookie” Williams. Oh come on! No way I was the only one thinking it.

Quote of the Week:

“I feel like Shagari can do this every night.”
—-Ramel Bradley following UK’s romp of Georgia St. last Wednesday in which ‘Shag’ threw in 16 and 6. ‘Smooth’ attempt, but don’t placate us like that.