South Carolina Enlists Grad Assistant to Play Quarterback

South Carolina football’s race to the SEC cellar is accelerating faster than anticipated. Shane Beamer could roll out a grad assistant to play quarterback when the Gamecocks open the 2021 season.

Zeb Noland joined the first-year coach’s staff this offseason to begin his long ascent up the coaching ladder. After a rash of injuries, he’s leaving the sideline to take snaps on the field.

Noland previously spent three season at Iowa State. He transferred to North Dakota State ahead of the 2020 season to serve as Trey Lance’s backup. When COVID-19 moved the season to the spring, Noland took over, throwing for 721 yards with five touchdowns and six interceptions. With one year of eligibility remaining, Beamer explained why he decided to give Noland a shot in hilarious fashion.

“He has great experience, and most importantly has played in a football game a heck of a lot more recent than anyone else on this team,” Beamer said.

South Carolina’s QB Calamity

In order to truly paint a clear picture of the disaster in Columbia, you should press play on the following tune before reading any further. Trust me, the longer you read, the more you will laugh.

Luke Doty started the 2020 season at wide receiver. He then moved to quarterback, started in the last two games and won the spring competition. That all changed when he was stepped on in a preseason practice. Now he’s in a boot and on a scooter with a foot sprain. There’s a chance he can return for the opening game against Eastern Illinois, but that remains up in the air.

Dakereon Joyner could play quarterback for the Cocks, but he’s moved back out to wide receiver. (Sensing a theme yet?) He caught 13 passes and completed 16 passes in a split role last fall.

Beamer has three other quarterback options. Freshman Colten Gauthier and redshirt sophomore Connor Jordan have zero collegiate experience. Jason Brown, a transfer from FCS St. Francis, has not played since 2019. As you can tell, there’s a reason why Beamer felt the need to move a GA onto the field. South Carolina is a mess, and that’s an insult to messes everywhere.