Tweet Beat: Tougher than a Lexington Bike Gang

@MrsTylerKSR

As part of the never-ending quest to bring you University of Kentucky news in the most ridiculous manner possible, I comb the Twitter-verse each week for the funniest, oddest, and sometimes, nearly illegible tweets from your favorite players and personalities. Basically, I read Twitter so you don’t have to. Without further ado, here are the best tweets of the week. It's been a long week. And don't worry, you're not the only one bitter about Kentucky's embarrassing loss to Little Brother on Saturday:

Keep fighting the good fight, Jeremy. Meanwhile, most of us focused our sights on basketball to ease the pain. Bolstered by Archie Goodwin's commitment, aka the first domino to fall, good vibes were all over Wildcat Lodge this week, starting with Ryan Harrow's latest love letter to the Big Blue Nation:

Love you too, Ryan. Eloy Centaurgus thought he'd try the "Like a Good Neighbor State Farm is there...with a sandwich" trick:

Elsewhere in the Lodge, Anthony Davis was doing his best Shagari Alleyne impression:

Ew. This week, Twitter taught me a few new slang words. First: "subtweet," short for "subliminal tweet," which ye olde Urban Dictionary defines as "directly referring to a particular person without mentioning their name or directly mentioning them." Okay, so talking about someone behind their back on a public forum like Twitter. Man, that's bitchy. Apparently there's a serial subtweeter around the basketball team...

Also new to my vocab: "cuff." No, not like a pant cuff or a handcuff...the act of making someone your main squeeze, or going public with your relationship. As they used to say in the olden days, "go steady." Well, Eloy may have found a lucky lady he's ready to "cuff":

Speaking of the ladies, backup QB Maxwell Smith has a new line he'd like to try out...

I'd say stick to football terms, Max, but it's not as though our offensive schemes are that sexy these days. Maybe Max can help Darius Miller and Randall Cobb with their lady problems?

I spend a little too much time reading into Aaron Boyd's proverb:

#freethecheese? Keeping with the football tweets, someone needs to get Forrest Gump's mom over to the dorms STAT!

After a rough loss against the Cards, Danny Trevathan "did him" and treated himself:

Retwisted and ready to go! Our boy Bookie seems to have found solace in Fashion Week...maybe he watched the shows online with Ryan Harrow?

Some of your favorite Wildcat alums took time to call out younger Cats on questionable tweets...

Nicely done, Krebs. Treat yourself to some pickled pig lips, why don't you?

Jon Hood called out some #oldtimerstudent for his antiquated Nokia ringtone:

Hey, those Nokia phones are built like tanks...don't be hatin'. #oldtimertweet Jodie Meeks doesn't tweet much, but he couldn't help but share this story. Ten bucks says the lady was Annie!

Little Brad Calipari makes his Tweet Beat debut by letting Jorts know he'll "eat" him with his "ridiculous post game":

Should we be worried that Perry Stevenson is retweeting One Tree Hill quotes?

Between tweets about Dolphin Tale and world peace, Ashley Judd further proved her UK fandom by pointing out the silver lining in the conference realignment: