What's your pretentious UNC fan name?
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Stilman White (left) and Surry Wood (right)[/caption]
It’s the holiday season, a time for us to sit back and count our blessings…like being Kentucky Wildcats and not Tar Heels.
You see, somewhere along the way, you learned that at Kentucky, we go to class like good boys and girls, we don’t associate with fraternities where boys wear coral short shorts and matching Croakies, we don’t lose basketball games to two different teams from the state of Iowa within a single calendar year, and we don’t give our kids first names that, in any other part of the country, would be last names.
It all starts with your name. Have you ever wondered what your name would have been like if your parents were entitled, pretentious, sweater-wearing Carolina Alumni?
Wonder no more, and be thankful you’re a UK Fan. Behold, the “KSR Pretentious UNC Fan Name Generator!”
Stilman White (left) and Surry Wood (right)[/caption]
It’s the holiday season, a time for us to sit back and count our blessings…like being Kentucky Wildcats and not Tar Heels.
You see, somewhere along the way, you learned that at Kentucky, we go to class like good boys and girls, we don’t associate with fraternities where boys wear coral short shorts and matching Croakies, we don’t lose basketball games to two different teams from the state of Iowa within a single calendar year, and we don’t give our kids first names that, in any other part of the country, would be last names.
It all starts with your name. Have you ever wondered what your name would have been like if your parents were entitled, pretentious, sweater-wearing Carolina Alumni?
Wonder no more, and be thankful you’re a UK Fan. Behold, the “KSR Pretentious UNC Fan Name Generator!”
Step 1: Select Your Birth Month/First Name
January: Wood February: Sullivan March: Fisher April: Peterson May: Carling June: Brown July: Ward August: Surry September: Adams October: Barnes November: Hastings December: Ewing
Step 2: Select Your Birth Day/Middle Name
1st: Tarquin 2nd: Saunders 3rd: Montgomery 4th: Rupert 5th: Phoenix 6th: Octavius 7th: Auden 8th: Lennon 9th: Murray 10th: Salinger 11th: Chalmers 12th: Zane 13th: Silas 14th: Finn 15th: Oliver 16th: Asher 17th: Jasper 18th: Gaines 19th: Atticus 20th: Quinn 21st: Jackson 22nd: Simmons 23rd: Stilman 24th: Desmond 25th: Brice 26th: Rawlings 27th: Tanner 28th: Dane 29th: Burke 30th: Frasor 31st: Wooten
Step 3: Select Your Decade of Birth/Last Name
1930s: Channing III 1940s: Pershing II 1950s: Rhodes IV 1960s: Spaulding II 1970s: Travers III 1980s: Albers IV 1990s: Kettering III 2000s: Paddington II
What’s your UNC fan name? Share it in the comments! Using your fake name, introduce yourself to a Carolina fan at the game Saturday, and then wait until you see their face relax as if in the presence of fellow faux aristocracy.
Then be like, “Nah, just kidding, my name is Bill. Go Cats.” And be thankful that you, your parents, and your team don’t suck.
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