Staff Predictions: Michigan vs. Hawai'i

Michigan takes on Hawai’i Saturday night in Ann Arbor following one of the most stunning upsets in staff predictions history.

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TheWolverine.com analyst and former All-Big Ten offensive lineman Doug Skene has five Big Ten championship rings. He also played for Bill Parcells and the New England Patriots, starting and blocking for quarterback Drew Bledsoe before blowing out his knee in Game 6 (1994), and has become successful in business following his NFL career.

All that said — he wasn’t exactly the best prognosticator when it came to Michigan football.

That all changed on one glorious afternoon in Ann Arbor. Skene turned a corner last week, capturing the opening week Staff Predictions title. And we couldn’t be prouder of the big guy. He’s back to defend his title in Week 2, and while the outcome of the game is pretty much a foregone conclusion … well, the score is not.

Will head coach Jim Harbaugh call off the dogs when it gets out of hand? Or is he going to let sophomore J.J. McCarthy sling it, and sling it some more? Will Hawai’i break up a potential shutout with a late, meaningless touchdown, or will the Michigan defense keep the Rainbow Warriors off the scoreboard?

These are the scintillating discussion points in games like these.

The spread is now 52 points, and that’s an awful lot, no matter the opponent. Apparently, though, the Rainbow Warriors’ quarterback battle makes Steven Threet vs. Nick Sheridan look like Tom Brady vs. Drew Henson. Hawaii will probably try to run a bit more, so it will be good to get the Michigan defense some work against an experienced offensive front.

Again, congratulations to Skene, who gets whatever gift was promised last week. This week’s winner gets the VHS tape “June Jones and the Run & Shoot — the Hawai’i Glory Years” and new play-by-play man Doug Karsch’s new book, “You Really Don’t Need Hair to do Radio — the Secret of my Success.”

This week’s picks:

CHRIS BALAS: This is one of those games in which pure luck will decide the staff picks winner — unless I win, of course. Then it’s skill.

It’s a “name your score” type of game, and it says here Jim Harbaugh will call off the dogs in the third quarter and run clock. Michigan 55, Hawai’i 3

JOHN BORTON: Hawai’i features gorgeous beaches, impressive lava outcroppings, mountains, waterfalls, stunning ocean settings … and lousy college football. Quarterback J.J. McCarthy’s eyes are likely bigger than a Disney heroine’s at the prospect of whomping the Warriors. He and the rest of the Wolverines will do just that, without as much mercy as a Great White Shark affords a stray seal.

Hawaii 5-0? Nah, why stop there? Cook ’em, Dano. Michigan 63, Hawaii 9

CLAYTON SAYFIE: Michigan is a 51.5-point favorite, the largest point spread in program history, because it’s a top-4 team going against a bottom-4 squad. Hawai’i was a mess this offseason with 20 transfers out and a controversy over who would be the head coach. Timmy Chang has a promising future, but he came back to his alma mater at a brutal time.

With Michigan being in a quarterback battle, the Wolverines will keep the foot on the gas longer than normal in a game like this. Hawai’i, on the other hand, has an injury at quarterback, with Brayden Schager getting hurt at the end of last week’s loss to Western Kentucky (Joey Yellen will start, but he’s played less than Schager this year; Schager could be available in a reserve role).

This will be an ugly one. Michigan 73, Hawai’i 0

ANTHONY BROOME: There is arguably more buzz over this game than the opener for obvious reasons. J.J. McCarthy makes his first collegiate start at quarterback under the lights at Michigan Stadium. Elite 2024 target Jadyn Davis will be in attendance. Is this a coronation for the next era of Michigan passers?

Tap the brakes, Anthony. It’s Hawai’i.

But seriously, this feels like it has the potential to be a turning point. If McCarthy balls out on Saturday, he has a shot to leave little doubt he should be the team’s quarterback moving forward. He’ll be held to the same standard McNamara was last week. It has to look sharp, crisp and drives have to end in points, specifically touchdowns. Saturday’s showcase is less about the highlight reel plays and more about the little things. Are your reads correct? Are you hitting receivers in stride? Can you get a ball out quickly to the numbers? If McCarthy proves to be advanced enough in these areas on top of the dual-threat playmaking ability we know he has, the opponent on the other side doesn’t matter. He will have proven worthy of the starting role.

Oh, right, Hawai’i. They’re the worst team in the FBS. With a night game atmosphere and some extra juice to this game after the opener, it will get ugly. Michigan 61, Hawai’i 3

DOUG KARSCH: Hawai’i has really struggled. The Rainbow Warriors have given up 2 scoop-and-scores (one to Alex Orji’s brother Anfernee) and a pick-six. They have allowed more than 1,000 total yards of offense. They have NO SACKS through two games. And they have been outscored in the second half of games 70-7.

It truly is a “name-your-score,” kind of game. So I will just go with the above. Michigan 70, Hawai’i 7

DOUG SKENE: The most exciting Michigan football competition this Saturday won’t be the game vs Hawai’i — it will be the QB performance drama that has been brewing since March. With that in mind, I’m not going to get too excited about watching J.J. or Cade carve up a weak — no, terrible — Rainbow Warriors defense.  

This one will be over by the end of the first quarter. Michigan 63, Hawai’i 7