ChadTough: How the memory of his late brother drives 2024 Notre Dame quarterback commit CJ Carr

On the inside of CJ Carr’s right wrist, the one that has afforded him the opportunity to play football at the University of Notre Dame, are four letters in thick, black ink.

They’ll be there for as long as he lives, an ode to a loved one who’s living no longer — physically. Spiritually, he hasn’t gone anywhere. All CJ has to do is turn the palm he flings footballs with upward to see him. To remember him.

Chad.

The tattoo, complete with a cross, memorializes CJ’s younger brother, the “funniest kid in the family.” The kid who might have shown up to CJ’s commitment ceremony on June 9 wearing USC Trojans gear when his older brother pledged to play for the Notre Dame Fighting Irish just to cause a stir.

That’s who Chad Carr was, a jovial prankster who loved to share a laugh, all in good fun, until the day diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma, the scientific term for an inoperable brain tumor more commonly referred to as DIPG, took his life on Nov. 23, 2015. He was diagnosed exactly 14 months prior on Sept. 23, 2014.

CJ was 10 when he laid his little brother to rest. Chad was 5.

“He always understood where this was going,” said Tammi Carr, CJ’s mother. “He watched his brother fade, really, and lose one thing after the next.”

Taking Nothing For Granted

CJ hadn’t started playing competitive football when Chad first got ill, but the sport was already religion for the Carr family.

CJ’s paternal grandfather, Lloyd Carr, was the head coach at Michigan from 1995-2007. He led the Wolverines to their most recent national championship in 1997. His maternal grandfather, Tom Curtis, was an All-American safety and College Football Hall of Famer for U-M from 1967-69.

Tammi went to Michigan. It’s where she met her husband, Jason, a former Michigan quarterback from 1992-95.

The family spent many fall Saturdays watching the Wolverines. Chad always seemed to steal the show.

“Chad would be like, ‘I like Ohio State, I like Alabama, I like Michigan State,'” Tammi said. “And he would do it to get us worked up. We’d play it up and act like it was funny. We joke that he’s up there in Heaven just chuckling that his brother chose a rival. He would love it.”

In a way, Chad is responsible for that choice.

Through his brother’s grueling 14-month battle with DIPG, CJ learned there’s more to life than Ann Arbor. He’s entering his junior year as the starting quarterback for Saline High School, which is situated less than seven miles south of Michigan Stadium. The Big House.

Maize and blue is all CJ has ever known. His talent as a quarterback prospect would have been accepted with open arms right up the road. He’s the No. 5 QB recruit in the country in the class of 2024 according to the On3 Consensus player rankings. A number like that opens the door to plenty of other possibilities, though.

CJ went through the door because his little brother doesn’t have the same luxury anymore. He’s carving his own path. It’s what Chad would have done.

“I’m not taking anything for granted because of the experiences we had with Chad,” CJ said. “What his legacy will continue to show is don’t take your time here for granted. You only have so much of it.”

The Right Decision

The Notre Dame coaching staff had much to do with CJ’s decision to go against the family tradition. It wasn’t all a divine diversion.

CJ gave credit to head coach Marcus Freeman and offensive coordinator Tommy Rees for cultivating and maintaining the type of relationship it takes to court a player of his caliber.

To court a player who isn’t the average 17-year-old.

“In a lot of ways it has helped him become the person he is because he grew up fast,” Tammi said. “He went through something a child should never have to experience. It gave him another perspective on life, on not sweating the small stuff and not worrying what other people think about him and following his heart.”

Tammi and Jason worried CJ wouldn’t ever get to the point of committing to play at a place like Notre Dame. When Chad passed, their attention immediately turned to CJ and Tommy, CJ’s other brother two years his junior. Tommy wasn’t quite old enough to understand what Chad was going through in the way CJ was. But now he’s entering his freshman year of high school. He’s slated to be CJ’s backup at Saline.

They got through the tough times together.

“They are best friends now,” Tammi said. “It is the most heartwarming thing to see because that is special to us. I think their relationship changed. I think they are very grateful to have each other. CJ is a great big brother to Tommy. He’s there for everything.”

“Ball” was the first word other than “momma” and “dada” out of both CJ and Tommy’s mouths. For Chad, it was “doggie.” In the same way CJ and Tommy love sports, Chad loved to explore. He was fond of critters, creatures and the outdoors.

CJ admired his brother’s curiosity. Some of his most cherished memories with Chad were when they’d set off into the forest to search for the unknown.

“It set him apart,” CJ said.

It’s a sense of independence that sets CJ apart, too. His confidence in making a choice about his future many in his hometown have questioned and tried to make sense of.

It makes perfect sense to CJ. Chad helped bring forth such clarity.

“I’m going to the best university in the country,” CJ said. “There’s no wavering like, ‘Did I make the right decision?’ I know I did.”

He’s Always There

Tammi hasn’t wavered, either.

She learned Neil Armstrong, the former United States astronaut who was the first man to walk on the moon, had a daughter, Karen, who died of DIPG less than three months before her third birthday. She dove into DIPG statistics while Chad was still fighting.

Tammi learned DIPG specifically accounts for 10-15% of all brain tumors in children. It’s the leading cause of death from pediatric brain cancer.

The tumor interferes with a child’s ability to move, communicate, eat, drink, etc. As it grows, a child experiences vision problems and weakness in the face and limbs. Normal activities become impossible. The body shuts down on itself until the heart stops beating.

To this day, there is no cure.

DIPG isn’t genetic. It isn’t brought on by external factors. Recent research suggests DIPG tumor formation may coincide with brain development. Adults are not commonly susceptible to DIPG, for instance. But more research is required to exactly pinpoint what causes DIPG while the brain is in its formative stages and if there is a way to combat it once it has already appeared.

Tammi and Jason have dedicated their lives to that research.

The ChadTough Defeat DIPG Foundation has become the Carr’s calling card. It started with Tammi just wanting to do something — anything — to contribute to a cause that clearly needed some attention. It has grown into a foundation that has funded $20 million to over 48 researchers at 31 worldwide institutions.

It’s the largest contributor to DIPG research funds in the world.

“We can put a man on the moon but we hadn’t done anything (about DIPG),” Tammi said. “We were just accepting that these deaths were happening. It was just accepted.

“My husband and I decided that if more people had done something 30 years ago, maybe Chad would be here today. Although we knew it wasn’t going to save him, we wanted Chad to be a part of what would one day cure kids 30 years from now.”

Tammi called Chad’s bout with DIPG “God’s plan.” She said Chad’s situation served as an eye-opener of sorts to the perilous disease.

The ChadTough foundation has partnered with over 30 families across the country. Tammi was on her way back to Saline from Chicago when she agreed to speak with Blue & Gold Illustrated. She said the time she would spend with Chad today is the time she now devotes to the foundation.

Anyone who’s a mother realizes just how much time that is.

“Chad had a job to do,” she said. “I hate that it was his job, but he inspired a lot of people. He inspired a movement. We’re just continuing his work. That’s the way we look at it.”

He certainly inspired CJ.

CJ hated going to ChadTough events before that fateful day in November almost seven years ago, mostly because Chad wasn’t even there. He was back at the hospital. In a bed, unable to be a normal kid.

But now CJ realizes why he had to go to those events. It was the beginning of something special — something that could one day change the world.

“Looking at the big picture now, it’s shown us how big of an impact my parents have made in the cancer field,” CJ said. “The millions of dollars they’ve raised will help the kids who will survive this in the next 10 years who are fighting battles right now. It makes you appreciate what they’ve done.”

CJ got his tattoo on May 26, his 17th birthday. His mom got one too. It also spells out Chad, in Chad’s handwriting, with an orange heart floating over the “d.” That was Chad’s favorite color.

It wasn’t maize. It wasn’t blue. It was orange. It’s colored all over the Carr’s home, just as Chad will be all over with CJ everywhere he goes.

“He’s always there with me whether I’m playing football or playing video games or doing anything,” CJ said. “He’s always there watching over me and my family.”