Scott Davis: Carry that weight, that's what family does
Scott Davis has followed South Carolina athletics for over 40 years and provides commentary from a fan perspective. He writes a weekly newsletter year-round (sign up here) and a column during football season that’s published each Monday on GamecockCentral.com.
I felt everything a human being can feel on Saturday.
You probably did, too.
I felt a powerful surge of pride watching ESPN’s College GameDay broadcast, seeing the South Carolina Gamecock family show up and show out one more time, like they always have, like they always will. A giddy throng stretched across Gamecock Park, so large it couldn’t be contained by ESPN’s cameras, as the network kept switching over to an aerial shot to provide a view of all the signs, all of the outstretched arms, all of the hopes and dreams of a fan base that never gives up.
Oh, I felt those hopes and dreams rising up, too. I felt them fluttering in my chest when an exuberant Shane Beamer popped up on the GameDay stage before the game and raised his arms in front of the faithful.
I felt them building and building and then sliding over into full-on belief as the Gamecocks built a 17-0 lead over LSU, the old foe from the Bayou that has compiled a trophy case full of SEC and national championships across the decades.
This was going to happen.
This was going to be one of those prayers that actually gets answered.
This was going to be one of those days – so few across the lonely decades of Gamecock football – when all of those hopes and dreams and beliefs that gather on fall Saturdays inside Williams-Brice Stadium surged into something bigger than all of us.
Then the mood swung again. I felt fear as the third quarter rolled on for what felt like an entire month.
I felt anger as I watched a hapless refereeing crew become strangely fixated on making the day about themselves rather than the players who were giving everything they had on the field.
And when it was all over, and the scoreboard read LSU 36 – South Carolina 33, I felt empty, drained and numb.
By the time Sunday morning came, sadness had arrived with it.
I took a long walk Sunday in a misty rain in Greenville near my in-laws’ home, holding on to that old familiar feeling: Sunday morning coming down.
There are variations of disappointment that a lifelong fan can feel during the course of a football season. There’s the mild case of self-loathing you experience when you’ve let your hopes soar even though your team wasn’t ready to win yet (like we felt after last year’s season opener against North Carolina). There’s the genuine disillusionment you feel when watch your team go through the motions and underperform against an overmatched opponent (this season’s Old Dominion game).
And there’s what we’re feeling today, after a game that meant so much and started so well slipped away from South Carolina again.
It’s OK for us to call it what it is: Sadness.
Do we really need me, of all people (someone who is not a football analyst and makes no claim to be), to rehash all of the impossible things that somehow clicked into place to deny the Gamecocks and their fans a victory that could have meant so much to the program?
Do we really need to go back over – again – all of the ridiculous calls and non-calls by the guys in the striped shirts, all of the adversity that South Carolina was asked to endure when competing with a desperate and talented opponent? Losing your starting quarterback, battling the refs and having to survive a spirited effort from an elite team needing a win? It all proved too much.
You don’t need me to try to break down what happened to South Carolina’s defense in the third quarter or the team’s offensive approach in the fourth – there are plenty of smarter people who can and should do that for us.
What matters to me the most, anyway – and what always has – is the fans and what they’re feeling after a day like this.
Someone once told me that when you’re anxious about something, imagine the worst thing that could happen. It’s usually not nearly as bad as you think it is.
In this case, truthfully, it doesn’t sound too good.
What if we spend the rest of our lives pulling for this team and never see them win the SEC title? What if we never get to wear that “SEC Champions” T-shirt, never get to give a knowing, condescending smile to all those Clemson and Georgia fans who’ve given us so much grief and made our lives so miserable at all those family functions and neighborhood picnics and church services over the years?
What if all that we end up getting from all of this effort and toil and struggle ends up being this: The memories that we’ve made with our family and friends, and the knowledge that we showed the world how much we loved our school and our state?
My friends, it has to be enough.
It has to be.
Knowing that all of this might not ever come with a shiny championship trophy is the weight that we’ve been asked to carry if we love this team, this school, this place. I don’t know why we were asked to carry this weight – we love our team and our school and our place unlike anyone else. Why us?
I don’t know.
What I do know is that carrying the weight is the price of loving something, of being a part of something, of family.
I know you want to put the weight down sometimes on days like this, on these days when it seems like the game is rigged, days when it seems like it will never be our time, when it seems like this weird, undefinable sadness is all we will ever get back from this thing. I know, because I have, too.
Sometimes you wonder if it wouldn’t be wonderful to put it down, walk free into the sunshine and let it all go.
But I say this to myself as much as I say it to you.
Don’t.
You can’t.
Carry it.
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The South Carolina Gamecock Fans Game Balls of the Week
This week’s Game Balls are named after Saturday’s Most Valuable Players: South Carolina fans. Let’s give our first one to…
South Carolina Gamecock Fans – Let me ask something to the rest of the football fans in the United States of America, all of those so-called “rabid” fans of elite programs like Michigan and Notre Dame and Southern Cal and Georgia and Ohio State and, yes, LSU: What if in over 125 years of rock-solid support, this is what you’d received for your commitment: Zero SEC titles, no national championships, and a handful of bowl victories in second-tier bowls that are not named Sugar, Rose, Cotton or Orange? Would you still have ESPN’s pregame and broadcasting crew marveling for hours on end at your dedication and faithfulness? Would you still fill your stadium to the rafters with bloodthirsty fans on a Saturday morning? Would announcers be calling your home field a “cauldron of noise”? Would that happen? Would it?
Rocket Sanders – This was big boy SEC rushing: 19 carries for 143 yards and two touchdowns against a defense that entered each series knowing the Gamecocks probably weren’t going to be successful passing the football.
Having an “A Team” in the Broadcast Booth – I can’t believe I’m about to praise Kirk Herbstreit, but I’ve gotten so accustomed to watching South Carolina games being called by the SEC Network’s 12-string broadcasting crew that I couldn’t help but notice what a difference it made listening to savvy, veteran professionals like Chris Fowler and Herbie. No one could ever accuse Fowler and Herbstreit of pro-South Carolina bias, but even they couldn’t hide their bafflement and disdain for what was happening with the officiating in the second half. Both also praised – repeatedly – the atmosphere and the fans. Speaking of which…
The GameDay Broadcast – It was a three-hour long commercial for the University of South Carolina. I don’t ever want to hear a Gamecock fan groan about having GameDay coming to one of our games again. Rece Davis even intoned the legendary “Saturday in South Carolina” narration as he introduced the show. Speaking of which…
Shane Beamer’s GameDay Appearance – Energetic, confident, powerful. It reminded me of what I’ve written about so many times: I want this coach to succeed at this place. I always pull for whoever coaches South Carolina because I want South Carolina to win. Simple enough, right? In Beamer’s case, I’m actually pulling for him, because I know that he actually understands us in a way that no other coach has. In a perfect world, this should be the guy that makes it happen for us. Of course, whether that comes true or not depends on whether the Gamecocks can start winning games like the one on Saturday often enough.
My Father-in-Law’s Comment Afterwards that “This is the Kind of Game Where You Don’t Want to Watch Anymore Football for the Rest of the Day When It’s Over” – Couldn’t agree more. Kentucky and Georgia? The Civil War in Oregon? A&M and Florida? Nah. Too soon.
[Win two tickets to the South Carolina-Akron football game]
The South Carolina-LSU Officiating Crew Memorial Deflated Balls of the Week
There’s no feeling quite like the demoralization a fan experiences when your team loses a nail-biter and you feel like the officiating crew actually helped decide the outcome. It makes you feel like…well, putting that weight down and walking away towards the sunshine. Let’s hand some Deflators to…
The South Carolina-LSU Officiating Crew – Two touchdowns taken off the board from the South Carolina defense. Mysterious penalty calls when the crew seemed incapable of even naming the number of the player who’d allegedly committed the alleged foul, followed by non-calls on what seems like obvious infractions. The ABC broadcasting team wondering aloud about a meltdown from the men in stripes. Boos raining down from the Williams-Brice rafters. And a game decided by three points with a long South Carolina field goal attempt falling just wide as time expired, when a win might have sent the program soaring into a special season in Shane Beamer’s fourth year. Think Gamecock fans are frustrated today?
Costly Self-Imposed Mistakes – Turnovers, penalties, and an overall air of sloppiness kept the day from ending as it should have and as the universe clearly wanted it to: With South Carolina rewarding its players, coaches and fans with a hard-fought victory.
Having to Watch LSU QB Garrett Nussmeier Put His Team on His Back and Will Them to a Win – Nussmeier got the job done for his team on Saturday. Whenever he had to make a big play in the second half, he did it, despite getting buried into the Williams-Brice turf time and time again by South Carolina’s ferocious pass rush. It was even more gut-wrenching to watch because Nussmeier’s antics throughout the game – jawing at and flapping his arms at officials, smiling annoyingly on the sidelines – made me absolutely root against him even more than I already was. Which leads me to…
A Red-Faced Brian Kelly Leaving the Field in Victory – Does anyone in the SEC attempt to huddle with and/or argue with officials after every single play more than LSU head coach Brian Kelly? I still can’t get used to this guy coaching in the Southeastern Conference.
When it was all over, we were left to watch Kelly and Nussmeier and the rest of the Tigers head back to the Bayou with a victory, just like most of America expected they would.
Most of America, of course, doesn’t know how hard our team fought to change that outcome, or how difficult it can sometimes be for those of us who love this team to pull ourselves back together one more time to yell and scream and cheer for them.
We do it, always and forever, knowing that the yelling and screaming and cheering may itself be all we get in return for our efforts.
We carry the weight because that’s what a family does.
Maybe all that we ever get from carrying the weight are the memories we have with the people we love, and the knowledge that we showed up for our school and our state. We always showed up. We always showed up.
Is it enough?
It has to be.
Tell me how you’re feeling after another disappointing loss by writing me at [email protected].
