I’ve become my parents: Teen Driver

[BigMotherTucker]

So I’ve been contemplating for some time to start a SPS series called “I’ve become my parents”. Honestly, it was a toss up between that and “Get off my lawn”. I reserve the right to change it.
Anyway, my 16 yo daughter can not drive. She’s had her permit almost a year and is two weeks away from getting her license. She’s terrible! And, you can’t tell her anything. I try, in a calm voice, to tell her to think about certain things and to look out for the other driver. She won’t listen and thinks I’m an idiot. It’s scary, I tell you. I’ve become close with the Lord while riding with her and the cheeks pucker.
Why don’t they listen. I’m just trying to help and to get her to avoid the mistakes i made. God help us all

I have a permitted 15yo. I have her talk through every move with me. It seems to help her think about what she’s doing. I’m pleasantly surprised by her driving so far.

 

[HWY51dog]

Why are kids these days so nervous/reluctant to learn to drive? I couldn’t wait & I picked it up almost immediately. My theory is kids are way too protected these days & don’t learn to be independent or do anything one their own.

This and they stay connected because of phones so they don't hangout in person like we did. The younger generation has a different mindset when it comes to driving than us (I'm 48) it was freedom.

 

[Dawgpile]

So I’ve been contemplating for some time to start a SPS series called “I’ve become my parents”. Honestly, it was a toss up between that and “Get off my lawn”. I reserve the right to change it.
Anyway, my 16 yo daughter can not drive. She’s had her permit almost a year and is two weeks away from getting her license. She’s terrible! And, you can’t tell her anything. I try, in a calm voice, to tell her to think about certain things and to look out for the other driver. She won’t listen and thinks I’m an idiot. It’s scary, I tell you. I’ve become close with the Lord while riding with her and the cheeks pucker.
Why don’t they listen. I’m just trying to help and to get her to avoid the mistakes i made. God help us all

It's too late (probably) for you, but giving them a go-kart when they're pre-teen is a great tool for young ones to learn car control.

 

[Pookieray]

Here is something crazy. My great uncle was 13 years old during WWII. He got a job in Oklahoma driving freight trucks. They knew he was 13 years old. They did not have enough grown men to drive. They were all in the military.

My dad was 14, left home in StL and went to LA area to live with an older sister that was married. got a job at a chicken processor, said he killed them early in the am, loaded onto a delivery truck, delivered them. At 14. He retired as a truck driver about 18 years ago and had been driving 68 years. Kept working part time after he retired running mail just to do something. He's 86 now and we had to take the keys this year.

 

[paindonthurt17]

I don't have kids, so I have no right to say this.

But if she was consistently ignoring me and driving like an idiot, she would have no vehicle to drive and no license until both of those things changed.

You have every right to say that because its using logic and common sense. You don't need kids to understand that.

 

[paindonthurt17]

Why are kids these days so nervous/reluctant to learn to drive? I couldn’t wait & I picked it up almost immediately. My theory is kids are way too protected these days & don’t learn to be independent or do anything one their own.

I think its partly on parents today.

My dad put me behind a wheel at 10 in his lap and let me steer. By 12 we were in a field and i was behind the wheel making circles. By 14 i could drive a stick shift.

 

[paindonthurt17]

That is not going to work. I take it you don't have a daughter?

I know for a fact it will work if you don't let her get a license and drive. Bc then she can't harm herself or anyone else. And if she wants to go somewhere and you don't have the time to take her you can simply say "well i guess its time to learn to listen to the adults in the room and learn to drive properly".

If that doesn't work she can sit her @$$ at home.

 

[msstatelp1]

When I was teaching my son he was bad about not paying attention and running stop signs. He ran one where the cross street didn’t stop and I did my best R. Lee Ermey impression.

“OMFG YOU JUST FKN KILLED ME!!! YOU RAN THAT STOP SIGN AND SOMEBODY TBONED US AND I’M NOW LAID OUT IN THE FKN MORGUE WAITING ON THE FUNERAL HOME TO PICK MY *** UP. I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY!!!! ETC ETC ETC”

He’s 35 now and says he doesn’t even dare slow roll through stop signs.

 

[MoronDawg]

Just to synthesize some of the great information here, make sure that your daughter gets a lot of practice handling the vehicle. We take it for granted, but handling an object that weighs a ton or two while hurtling through space is a big deal.

Some of the posters are stating that it is easier to teach someone how to drive in a small town versus a big city. I'm interpreting that to mean that it's easier to learn how to drive with fewer complications. So, go early in the day and traverse less travelled streets.

Like paindonthurt17 is implying, your daughter isn't getting any license or access to a vehicle until you say so. Set out your own goals for her, things she must master first. That girl can take the bus or walk until she gets it. The suggestion to verbalize what she's doing is also top notch.

Respect your daughter's learning process. When she's fully engaged in operating the vehicle, your suggestions are a distraction, and whatever reaction you're getting from her is likely just an ungracious request to allow her to focus without interference.

Mainly, help her develop some confidence.

 

[dog12]

I know for a fact it will work if you don't let her get a license and drive. Bc then she can't harm herself or anyone else. And if she wants to go somewhere and you don't have the time to take her you can simply say "well i guess its time to learn to listen to the adults in the room and learn to drive properly".

If that doesn't work she can sit her @$$ at home.

I agree with you. A father can forbid his daughter to get a license and not permit her to drive. That approach would very likely result in her not having any car accidents.

Do you have any children? If so, then have you taken this approach with your children? Did it work?

 

[paindonthurt17]

I agree with you. A father can forbid his daughter to get a license and not permit her to drive. That approach would very likely result in her not having any car accidents.

Do you have any children? If so, then have you taken this approach with your children? Did it work?

I don't need children to know it would work. You just told me it would.