Marcus Lattimore details decade-long emotional journey to overcome career-ending injury

In a stunning and thought-provoking new feature from ESPN writer Hallie Grossman, former South Carolina Gamecocks star Marcus Lattimore details the decade-long journey he took to emotionally and physically overcome the injury to his knee that derailed his future in the NFL.

His journey required not only physical healing and the hurdling of mental challenges, but it also required the man once considered a first son of South Carolina to ultimately quit his beloved state.

Now a mentor for football players at DIII Lewis and Clark, as well as high school players in the Portland area, the former Gamecocks running back shared his difficulty with the fame of his position and “putting on a cape” for the people in South Carolina.

“The pressure just kept building every year. More pressure, more pressure,” Lattimore said. “And even when I retired, I still felt pressured to be something, to be this person for everybody. I was so focused on how people viewed me. And people viewed me as this hero. I had to put on a cape every day.”

Lattimore: ‘I didn’t feel human’

Lattimore’s knee shattered in multiple places in his final game for South Carolina versus the Tennessee Volunteers. It wasn’t just his final collegiate game, the devastating knee injury would keep him from ever contributing for the San Francisco 49ers after they picked him in the fourth round of the 2014 NFL Draft.

Even when he starred for the team in Columbia, the running back felt trapped by the pressure to be everything and more for the state.

“I picked South Carolina because it was the University of South Carolina,” Lattimore said. “And at that time, I felt like I was South Carolina.”

“You get to a point where you see people don’t see you,” he added of his adoring fans who all knew of him, but didn’t truly know him. “I just wanted people to know I’m human. And I didn’t feel human.”

Blazing new trails in Portland

After officially retiring, Lattimore coached high school football in the state and, eventually, joined the Gamecocks staff as a director of player development. He quickly discovered that DI football was not for him.

“Just D-I in itself,” he says. “It’s just too big now. It’s too big for me, at least.”

He left Oregon after plans to move to France fell through during the COVID-19 pandemic. Lewis and Clark is a far cry from the multimillion-dollar facilities he played in as a young adult, but it brings him back to his roots.

“We have enough,” Lattimore said. “We have what we need. But, I mean, it’s just like playing in the mud. It feels like I’m back in Duncan, South Carolina.”

Now in his role as a mentor in Portland, Lattimore finally feels that he has the ability to be himself. On top of his work with football players, he also writes and travels.

“I’m not always waiting for somebody to come up,” Lattimore said. I don’t always have to be on. To be Marcus the player.”

Lattimore on knee injury: ‘It happened for me’

“I’m reminded every day I walk outside the doors of my home what happened on Oct. 27, 2012, when I dislocated my right knee,” the former running back told Gamecocks fans at his hall of fame induction. “And for the longest time, I blamed. I asked why. ‘It should’ve been a different way. It could’ve been a different way.’ I don’t ask why anymore. It didn’t happen to me, it happened for me.”

Lattimore’s former head coach Steve Spurrier learned of his new venture into player mentorship as the ESPN feature came together. The coaching legend said he wasn’t surprised.

“Is that right? Lewis & Clark?” Spurrier said. “I did not know that, but that doesn’t surprise me. That’s him. That’s his calling in life.”

Though South Carolina’s favorite son had to leave the state to find himself, he doesn’t believe it will be forever.

“It’s a vision,” Lattimore said. “I know that there will be an opportunity where I can lead something for the betterment of the community in South Carolina. I’ll have that opportunity one day, and that’s when I’ll go back. That’s home. That’s roots.”