Is it even possible to stay sober? And to not party?

[OG Goat Holder]

As I get older I'm trying to be more healthy and cut out drinking and such (insert your drug of choice). This got me thinking about if there really is a world out there without mind-altering substances. I know there is (Baptists) but I cannot imagine life that way, and I grew up that way. It's just so foreign to me now.

And further, is it possible to go through your younger years/college without partying? I'm not really joking here, I mean I would love all my kids to be church-going perfect citizens, but are you prepping them for a meltdown?

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free. What are the things you do to have fun? How can you have fun without day-drinking? One of the greatest joys in life.

Also - not talking about pain management here...I'm talking about recreation.

 

[Xenomorph]

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free.

Have you watched MSU athletics this year??... I don't think you're polling the correct group of people.

 

[TNDawg1]

Im substance free and maybe a few times a year enjoy a two ounce pour of barrel proof. I’ve witnessed what recreation has done to a lot of friends, some of whom died young. Others looking at the health trade offs as we approach middle age. Was it worth it ? Split-decision when the conversation arises.

 

[dorndawg]

Drinking starts to kick a lot of us in the dick around late 30s, into your 40s. Which incidentally is a common age on this here website.

I'd recommend https://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking to anyone wanting to reduce or completely cut out booze. I don't even like reddit especially as a whole, but it's a remarkable little corner of the internet.

 

[dawgman42]

I don't drink at all (and never have), and I'm not really and never have been into the "partying" seen. Sure, I go to events, parties, etc., and find my own ways to enjoy myself. But alcohol has messed up too many people in my wife's and my family, and it just really isn't worth it. As I enter my 50s, I have my own share of possible health concerns (getting old sucks in some ways), but I'm happy to know the "alcohol factor" isn't compounding or accelerating them.

 

[NTDawg]

As I get older I'm trying to be more healthy and cut out drinking and such (insert your drug of choice). This got me thinking about if there really is a world out there without mind-altering substances. I know there is (Baptists) but I cannot imagine life that way, and I grew up that way. It's just so foreign to me now.

And further, is it possible to go through your younger years/college without partying? I'm not really joking here, I mean I would love all my kids to be church-going perfect citizens, but are you prepping them for a meltdown?

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free. What are the things you do to have fun? How can you have fun without day-drinking? One of the greatest joys in life.

Also - not talking about pain management here...I'm talking about recreation.

I enjoy bourbon/rye and have a small collection but there are plenty of things I enjoy that don’t have to include alcohol, hiking, hunting, fishing, concerts, traveling, cooking/grilling. Now having a drink can be a part of those activities but not a requirement. The enjoyment of a nice pour is amplified by the people that you are with and the setting. For example from recommendations from SPS my son and I recently went backpacking in the Sipsey Wilderness area. We had a pour that night and it tasted better because of who I was with and where we were.

 

[dudehead]

As I get older I'm trying to be more healthy and cut out drinking and such (insert your drug of choice). This got me thinking about if there really is a world out there without mind-altering substances. I know there is (Baptists) but I cannot imagine life that way, and I grew up that way. It's just so foreign to me now.

And further, is it possible to go through your younger years/college without partying? I'm not really joking here, I mean I would love all my kids to be church-going perfect citizens, but are you prepping them for a meltdown?

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free. What are the things you do to have fun? How can you have fun without day-drinking? One of the greatest joys in life.

Also - not talking about pain management here...I'm talking about recreation.

Yes there is. By the grace of a loving God the presence of whom I awakened to as a result of taking the 12 steps, I have not had a drink or a mind-altering substance in 20 years. That 20 years has been the best 20 years of my life in spite of going through the normal ups and downs of life that is thrown at all of us. I am active in the 12 step community and enjoy a daily prayer and meditation practice so I don't "go back to sleep."

Try it. When in Jackson, I enjoy meeting with like people at Yana Club in the heart of Fondren. You are welcome to come join us.

 

[Noname.sixpack]

As I get older I'm trying to be more healthy and cut out drinking and such (insert your drug of choice). This got me thinking about if there really is a world out there without mind-altering substances. I know there is (Baptists) but I cannot imagine life that way, and I grew up that way. It's just so foreign to me now.

And further, is it possible to go through your younger years/college without partying? I'm not really joking here, I mean I would love all my kids to be church-going perfect citizens, but are you prepping them for a meltdown?

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free. What are the things you do to have fun? How can you have fun without day-drinking? One of the greatest joys in life.

Also - not talking about pain management here...I'm talking about recreation.

Not the answer you were shooting for but an answer none the less.

This is a decision that you make regardless of your current views and circumstances. If you want that life badly enough you make it happen. If you want to be "clean" then you have to do it for yourself. No excuses of fun or boredom.

 

[RutherfordBHayes]

I drank "to excess" less than 5 times in my life; all in my youth. Just didn't care for it.
I was active in a fraternity at MSU (Old Row). Lived in the fraternity house sophomore year. Went to all the parties. Had a blast. In my adulthood, I ran with the same crowd as then. Several times, I have been to crawfish boils and forgot to bring my Diet Coke and had to wash it down with beer or two, but I'd rather eat crawfish than not.
I'd turn the question around. What do the drinkers have that I don't? I'll be honest, as I have gotten to middle age, alcohol became an increasing burden on my friends. To the point, I really pity the ones that seem to be dependent on it. Most handle it fine, but I have never observed it being a benefit to anybody. But it damn sure has been a detriment to a few.
I understand a glass of wine with dinner, a single after dinner drink. But if you're drinking for the buzz, that monster will take you where you don't want to go, and he is hard to kill.

 

[preacher_dawg]

Here's to being a Presbyterian as we believe and teach things like alcohol are left to the conscience of the individual, but in moderation.

 

[HomeBoyDawg]

Moderation is the key to drinking and so many other things in life including eating, exercise, MSU sports, etc. If you can't drink in moderation, stay away from it.

 

[Perd Hapley]

I borderline quit drinking without even really trying to after having 3rd child. Just no time for it anymore. Also got away from beer and more into liquor / cocktails for whenever I do imbibe. Lasts longer and is cheaper and tastier in the long run. Saves room in the fridge, too.

One thing a friend of mine showed me is how much your resting heart rate drop is reduced during sleep after just one drink. Its wild that even in small quantities how it can 17 with your quality of sleep.

 

[Wesson Bulldog]

I stopped hard drinking after my 20th HS class reunion (38 y.o.). Took 3 days to get over. Did it one more time with college friends when State played at Vandy in 09. Another 3 days plus a long *** drive home. I've had less than 6 beers since then, and I have not missed it

 

[NTDawg]

If you are focused on health and doing everything to improve your health avoiding alcohol would be best along with quality sleep, appropriate exercise and avoiding processed foods. I try eat “healthy” and exercise.

But I said earlier I enjoy a pour of whiskey. I drink whiskey neat. Sometimes I’m alone and I’m able to explore the what makes that particular pour special whether age, mashbill, or some other technique. Other times in social settings a good pour can be enjoyed as part of the experience. If it ever becomes a crutch or something required for “good” time then I would have to make some changes. Also I don’t drink daily and I intentionally take time away from drinking such as dry January.

 

[jethreauxdawg]

I think if people are honest, they would say the only reason they drink is for the buzz. None of it tastes better than non-alcoholic alternatives. At least that’s the been the case for me. As dorn mentioned, one day (early 30’s) I realized I felt like crap after a night of drinking and that’s when I basically quit.
On the other hand, I did shoot my best round of golf in a long time (74) a couple of years ago while I was severely hungover. It was the last time I was hungover and I haven’t played that good since. Maybe I should drink more?

 

[BulldogBlitz]

If you stop drinking, what's the excuse for being an asshat?

 

[OG Goat Holder]

I think if people are honest, they would say the only reason they drink is for the buzz. None of it tastes better than non-alcoholic alternatives. At least that’s the been the case for me. As dorn mentioned, one day (early 30’s) I realized I felt like crap after a night of drinking and that’s when I basically quit.
On the other hand, I did shoot my best round of golf in a long time (74) a couple of years ago while I was severely hungover. It was the last time I was hungover and I haven’t played that good sense. Maybe I should drink more?

For me, no question it is about the buzz

 

[bigbub50]

I’ve battled addiction and alcoholism for 15 years. Stayed sober 7.5 yrs once and have 10 months currently. Try staying sober for a Month. Some ppl can sober up for a good reason (health, family, etc). Others require outside help. If you can’t sober up on your own, try visiting local AA group and asking for help. The longer you drink, the more likly a switch is going to flip at some point where you become alcoholic and start to experience intense consequences.
The sober life is a good one. It takes a lot of time to learn this new way of life, but I promise you, it’s a good life once you get over the hump.

 

[horshack.sixpack]

I think if people are honest, they would say the only reason they drink is for the buzz. None of it tastes better than non-alcoholic alternatives. At least that’s the been the case for me. As dorn mentioned, one day (early 30’s) I realized I felt like crap after a night of drinking and that’s when I basically quit.
On the other hand, I did shoot my best round of golf in a long time (74) a couple of years ago while I was severely hungover. It was the last time I was hungover and I haven’t played that good since. Maybe I should drink more?

I have a glass of wine or a cold beer because I enjoy them, especially paired with some meals or after a hot day in the yard. I would much prefer a beer with nearly any meal than a Coke, or tea. I don't get drunk. I don't drink to excess. I refuse to the let alcohol have an outsized presence in my life, but if I want a cold beer, I get one.

 

[NTDawg]

I think if people are honest, they would say the only reason they drink is for the buzz. None of it tastes better than non-alcoholic alternatives. At least that’s the been the case for me. As dorn mentioned, one day (early 30’s) I realized I felt like crap after a night of drinking and that’s when I basically quit.
On the other hand, I did shoot my best round of golf in a long time (74) a couple of years ago while I was severely hungover. It was the last time I was hungover and I haven’t played that good since. Maybe I should drink more?

Taste is very subjective and I guarantee the things that taste good to me is not the same for you. I stopped consuming sugar and can’t drink anything sweet. I haven’t had a cola or sweet tea in nearly a decade. I drink water, coffee, unsweetened tea, whiskey and some beer, in that order.

 

[Boom Boom]

As I get older I'm trying to be more healthy and cut out drinking and such (insert your drug of choice). This got me thinking about if there really is a world out there without mind-altering substances. I know there is (Baptists) but I cannot imagine life that way, and I grew up that way. It's just so foreign to me now.

And further, is it possible to go through your younger years/college without partying? I'm not really joking here, I mean I would love all my kids to be church-going perfect citizens, but are you prepping them for a meltdown?

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free. What are the things you do to have fun? How can you have fun without day-drinking? One of the greatest joys in life.

Also - not talking about pain management here...I'm talking about recreation.

Everything has its time and place, and it sounds like you are hanging on to the drinking life after you should have let it go. I did. Would it be better to be young again and party like it? Sure. But I'm not. Can you picture yourself living this way at 70? Time to start the transition.

You absolutely can have fun. Is it the same? No. Kinda like sex with a condom. It's still a good time if you're doing it right.

 

[Boom Boom]

Taste is very subjective and guarantee the things that taste good to me is not the same for you. I stopped consuming sugar and can’t drink anything sweet. I haven’t had a cola or sweet tea in nearly a decade. I drink water, coffee, unsweetened tea, whiskey and some beer, in that order.

That would make a terrible George Thorogood song.

 

[mstateglfr]

Spent my college years in various stages of inebriation.
20s was a lot of binge drinking 1or2x/week. Go to a bar with co-workers for the night type of drinking.
Didnt drink for a couple years in my early 30s and it was definitely a control issue, looking back.

I fully stopped drinking sometime in early 2020, but it wasnt AA or anything like that. I dont even know when my last drink was...I think it was sometime in Feb of '20?
- did it because I was working on losing weight.
- did it because my wife was diagnosed with celiac a year earlier and our house was/is fully gluten free(wheat in beers), so I wasnt drinking beer at home.
- did it because I never liked drinking around my kids and I wasnt exactly socializing at bars for much of that year, so most any drinking would have been at home.

I drink caffeine thru iced tea and DrPepper/Coke each day. Really hate that I am back on the pop train, but that is always a personal struggle.
Does caffeine use count as not staying sober? I dont count it as a substance when discussing sobriety, but I know some do view caffeine use as not staying sober.


As for kids and sobriety- I think the best thing you can do for kids is help them see that substance use is not a moral failing, and the most effective way to do that is to show them that all substances are simply a spectrum, and many legal medications are largely similar to many illegal drugs and legal drugs.
Teach them that medications do similar things as alcohol and illegal drugs- like increase neural activity or depress emotions and feelings.
Removing the unknown and mystery helps eliminate the moral judgement and allows them to view substances as tools vs crutches.
^ obviously this isnt universally successful and may not work with personalities that have addictive tendencies.

 

[OG Goat Holder]

Everything has its time and place, and it sounds like you are hanging on to the drinking life after you should have let it go. I did. Would it be better to be young again and party like it? Sure. But I'm not. Can you picture yourself living this way at 70? Time to start the transition.

You absolutely can have fun. Is it the same? No. Kinda like sex with a condom. It's still a good time if you're doing it right.

Nah, the partying part wasn't about me. Right now, I'm more into the 1-2 drinks a day sort of thing. Occasional slight hangovers, but they still suck. If I'm day drinking it's like at a ballgame or event something. I rarely get drunk. Too buzzed to drive, yes. But to me that's like 2-3 drinks. The biggest issue is that it's a productivity killer and time waster. But it's damn sure fun.

When I asked about partying, I was talking more about teens and early 20s - like ACTUAL partying. Thinking back, that's all I did, besides school work and odd jobs. I'm wondering if it was a waste of time, or something that people need to experience.

 

[OG Goat Holder]

As for kids and sobriety- I think the best thing you can do for kids is help them see that substance use is not a moral failing, and the most effective way to do that is to show them that all substances are simply a spectrum, and many legal medications are largely similar to many illegal drugs and legal drugs.
Teach them that medications do similar things as alcohol and illegal drugs- like increase neural activity or depress emotions and feelings.
Removing the unknown and mystery helps eliminate the moral judgement and allows them to view substances as tools vs crutches.
^ obviously this isnt universally successful and may not work with personalities that have addictive tendencies.

I like that.

And as for the cokes - sugar is pretty bad, albeit not a mind-alter. Of course when you drink liquor you're getting sugar so I can't really talk.

 

[dorndawg]

Everything has its time and place, and it sounds like you are hanging on to the drinking life after you should have let it go. I did. Would it be better to be young again and party like it? Sure. But I'm not. Can you picture yourself living this way at 70? Time to start the transition.

You absolutely can have fun. Is it the same? No. Kinda like sex with a condom. It's still a good time if you're doing it right.

This post, start to finish...

 

[57stratdawg]

Meditation teaches us that everything is mind altering. That’s pretty much the case against free will which is hard to argue against.

 

[Maroon Eagle]

The Beastie Boys fought for your right to party.

What’s not said is that you also have the right not to party.

As for me…

 

[SouthFarmchicken]

As I get older I'm trying to be more healthy and cut out drinking and such (insert your drug of choice). This got me thinking about if there really is a world out there without mind-altering substances. I know there is (Baptists) but I cannot imagine life that way, and I grew up that way. It's just so foreign to me now.

And further, is it possible to go through your younger years/college without partying? I'm not really joking here, I mean I would love all my kids to be church-going perfect citizens, but are you prepping them for a meltdown?

I'd like to hear from people that are totally substance-free. What are the things you do to have fun? How can you have fun without day-drinking? One of the greatest joys in life.

Also - not talking about pain management here...I'm talking about recreation.

I maybe have 12 drinks a year and don’t use any illegal substances or tobacco. I’m a reformed lawyer…who abused all those things as a lawyer.

I quit my law gig and no longer have the desire to do those things.

Hope that helps.

 

[Herbert Nenninger]

Never really liked the taste of alcohol so wasn’t a big temptation. Never drank in college. I’m not opposed to some social drinking in moderation; just wasn’t my thing. Between work, kids activities, and my own weekend warrior activities, I have plenty to occupy myself. I figure life can be hard enough as it is; I don’t want to put money and time into doing things that could potentially make it harder.
I’m in my 40s and can still run circles around most 20 year olds, and I don’t want to give that feeling up as long as possible. Two weeks ago I played four singles tennis matches in 2 days. And I’m just about to walk out the door and run some hill sprints and stadium steps down from my house. If I’m blessed enough to still be active and healthy when I’m “old”, I’m sure not gonna feel guilty about it.
I cover a nursing home that takes patients on ventilators. Most of them are really effed up. None of them are old. They’re all in their 20’s to 50’s, and most of them either had a wreck or a massive stroke with various substances in their system. And I’ve had a good share of reasonably well-raised guys on their 40s dying of cirrhosis.

 

[The Cooterpoot]

When you realize that **** doesn't make you feel better you'll back off. I had a problem with it for about 2 years. But realized it hurt me not helped me. I still drink a beer here and there with friends, I've gotten myself in shape and feel like I'm 30 (I'm 50). And there are predisposing things that can and will try to suck you back down into it. Nothing numbs life. It's up to you to figure out what makes you great too. Everybody has something and most don't realize what it is.

 

[Mr. Cook]

Have you watched MSU athletics this year??... I don't think you're polling the correct group of people.

"Six Pack Remembers" nominee

 

[Mr. Cook]

This post, start to finish...

View attachment 537818

I hate cleaning coffee from my keyboard and screen

 

[Double Dawg]

I guess I am one of the few who never got addicted to alcohol despite a family history of it. I am at the point where 95+% of my drinking is with a meal. I enjoy the taste of some things: a good wine with a fine meal; a beer or 2 with Mexican food or pizza; a bourbon on the rocks or with ginger beer while watching the Bulldogs play. I can have one & walk away, while other family members keep going until it is all gone or they pass out, whichever comes first. I also used to work for a local wine & spirits broker and just really never developed a habit for drinking. Now, while at State, there were several nights where I looked off the balcony of the fraternity house thinking, “I don’t remember eating that!”, but life got in the way of partying. I have enjoyed doing Scouts with my son, hunting & shooting, golf (even though I shoot twice my age) and traveling. I have come to the conclusion that we all find an addiction to something eventually. Hopefully it is something that is not destructive to ourselves or others.

 

[Chesusdog]

These days I typically only drink at Intimare social gatherings, hanging out with my dad, or when attending MSU athletics. My tolerance always seems to be a crapshoot lately. Sometimes after 3-4 drinks I'm toasty; other times I might kill half a bottle of bourbon or vodka and be just fine. Also as I get older I seem to often get hangovers while still actively drinking, which really has soured me on doing it with any real frequency.

 

[NukeDogg]

I think if people are honest, they would say the only reason they drink is for the buzz. None of it tastes better than non-alcoholic alternatives. At least that’s the been the case for me. As dorn mentioned, one day (early 30’s) I realized I felt like crap after a night of drinking and that’s when I basically quit.
On the other hand, I did shoot my best round of golf in a long time (74) a couple of years ago while I was severely hungover. It was the last time I was hungover and I haven’t played that good since. Maybe I should drink more?

I do not drink for a buzz, and if I do drink to the point where I start to feel one, that's the moment I stop because I absolutely hate feeling blurry and not in control and I despise a hangover.

I drink a pour of whiskey probably 5 nights a week, because I like the experience and the aromas and the taste and yeah it's to "take the edge off". I wait till the kid is asleep, nightly chores are done, wife is usually in bed or watching TV, and I'll pour one up, kick back and have that "ahh, the day is done" type of moment.

 

[dawglawz]

My friends, I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whiskey. All right, here is how I feel about whiskey: If when you say whiskey you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.

But, if when you say whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it. This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.

 

[Maroon Eagle]

My friends, I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whiskey. All right, here is how I feel about whiskey: If when you say whiskey you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.

But, if when you say whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it. This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.

Soggy Sweat’s whiskey speech

 

[GloryDawg]

I have never tasted alcohol in any form. Don't know the feeling and don't care to know the feeling.

 

[Felonious Junk]

I hung it up 4 years ago. I’m 47. Just got tired of feeling crappy. Even after 2-3 beers I would feel sluggish for a day or two. So if I drank a couple times a week I was never 100% at any point. Either drinking or recovering from it.

When you quit, it takes about 30 days to start to wake up. 6 months your mind starts to sharpen and after a year or so, you realize that you’ve been less than yourself for the entire time that you’ve been using alcohol. It truly is poison that has done more damage to humans than any other substance. If it were invented today, there is no way it would be legal.

As for staying sober, yeah it takes some effort at first if your drinking has been habitual. For me it was Pavlovian in the sense that most of my social activities also included alcohol so I had to fight that innate urge for a while but it wears off pretty quickly. Also, there is a fear that it will be awkward around your friends when you tell them you don’t drink anymore. But you’ll quickly realize that no one really cares and the people that do aren’t really friends anyway.

Good luck if you are serious about wanting to quit. It’s like waking up from the matrix if you do. You’ll become aware of the fact that everything is built around alcohol in our culture both in the US and around the world. It’s crazy.